Fall semester - full of adventure, life, good people... The list goes on. It was a long semester, it was crazy - your typical roller coaster of life. There was lots of down days - but I long felt more up days; mostly because I avoided lots of those down days. I hiked mountains to feel alive because I didn't want to lay in bed and feel the emptiness inside me boiling like hot water the week after a car accident I was in. I made jokes because I didn't want to cope with the feelings of depression I felt through the month of October that Alaska was a struggling through a stage of multiple suicides.
I was running away.
I didn't want to stop - I didn't want to believe what was going on.
But eventually the running has to come to a stop. I'm exhausted. I'm sick of feeling like I live a black and white world - of people making war. A war of sin. I'm tired of running. I have nothing left in me.
But I guess that's where my man JC comes in. He loves the man on the side of the road who feels depressed. He loves the lady in the store who is an alcoholic. He loves the little boy in the house being beat up by his parents both physically and sexually. He loves the man that is having an affair. It's done. He was sick of seeing the black and white world we live in - so he took his life. The burden is gone. It's broken. He did it all - he loves us in the midst of chaos.
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. John 10:10
I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. John 16:33
Christmas break is here. That means I get to go home - not only for break. I'm taking the semester off. Because I'm tired of running; I'm going to stop. It's going to be a time of rest. A time to breathe. And a time to adventure - adventure the light of life.
A time to kill and a time to heal.