Fall semester - full of adventure, life, good people... The list goes on. It was a long semester, it was crazy - your typical roller coaster of life. There was lots of down days - but I long felt more up days; mostly because I avoided lots of those down days. I hiked mountains to feel alive because I didn't want to lay in bed and feel the emptiness inside me boiling like hot water the week after a car accident I was in. I made jokes because I didn't want to cope with the feelings of depression I felt through the month of October that Alaska was a struggling through a stage of multiple suicides.
I was running away.
I didn't want to stop - I didn't want to believe what was going on.
But eventually the running has to come to a stop. I'm exhausted. I'm sick of feeling like I live a black and white world - of people making war. A war of sin. I'm tired of running. I have nothing left in me.
But I guess that's where my man JC comes in. He loves the man on the side of the road who feels depressed. He loves the lady in the store who is an alcoholic. He loves the little boy in the house being beat up by his parents both physically and sexually. He loves the man that is having an affair. It's done. He was sick of seeing the black and white world we live in - so he took his life. The burden is gone. It's broken. He did it all - he loves us in the midst of chaos.
The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. John 10:10
I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. John 16:33
Christmas break is here. That means I get to go home - not only for break. I'm taking the semester off. Because I'm tired of running; I'm going to stop. It's going to be a time of rest. A time to breathe. And a time to adventure - adventure the light of life.
A time to kill and a time to heal.
A time to tear down and a time to build up.
4
A time to cry and a time to laugh.
A time to grieve and a time to dance.
5
A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a time to turn away.
6
A time to search and a time to quit searching.
A time to keep and a time to throw away.
7
A time to tear and a time to mend.
A time to be quiet and a time to speak.
8
A time to love and a time to hate.
A time for war and a time for peace.
Ecclesiastes 3:3-8
But I don't know what I'm doing. Maybe I'm going to be in an office answering phones. Or at the store. Maybe even learning to fly planes. Maybe I'm going to spend lots of time with my nieces and nephews - who I only spent time w twice a year. Maybe I'm going to be a Young Life leader.
I will live in Bethel - a population of 6,000. A town with one high school, one road, two grocery stores, one hospital , and four churches. A town of darkness. Bethel doesn't have a Young Life program {yet}. Such a beautiful statement; "doesn't have a Young Life YET".
Young Life has been a huge impact in my life. I've seen people who devote lots of their personal time to pour out onto high school students. I've seen those people become friends with students. They love those coffee dates and even come to sports games. They love screaming and shouting names at club, even when it means getting whipped cream all over their face.
They love students. They love because God first loved. I want that in Bethel. You are worth it. You are worth the whipped cream on the face. You are worth the coffee dates. You are worth the death on the cross.
I want to show that to these kids.
But I'm scared. It's going to be a war zone. It's going to be dark.
It's a good this JC's got my back. I need the prayers. I need your encouragement. Support. Love. I need it all. It's going to be a journey.
No comments:
Post a Comment